Evening guys, so I was just browsing on asos and cringing at some of the things I was scrolling through. So I decided to blog about it. Standard.
I am going to guide you through my top 5 fashion pet hates, the things you will probably never see me wear!!
Number 5: The cropped tank top
Ok, so I just wanna say that it doesn't bother me if you wear any of the things I put up on my top 5 pet hates, however I just personally do not understand why you like them, that's all. Lol.
So the cropped tank top. It's tight and makes your boobs look squashed. It also is at the complete wrong height, where your belly button is just peeping out, but it still lets your rolls hang out - not so flattering in my opinion. Already, WHY?! I also feel like it squashes all your middle together and leaves your arms to bulge out and I just end up feeling like I'm being squeezed at the tummy and all my flesh is forced out into my arms - it's just so uncomfortable!!! To be honest, tank tops are fine, they're kinda casual and are good to chill out at home I guess, but I just think they pick out all the wrong places and who wants that?!?!?!
Number 4: PEEP TOES
What on earth is the point in a peep toe?! Ok, so, if it's cold outside, your toes freeze and go purple and verge on falling off. If it's hot, the rest of your toes and feet get all hot and bothered because there's not enough space to breathe. Also, they bloody rub like hell! Those two toes peeping through get all stabbed and hurt by the shitty fake leather and then who even wants to wear them?!?! NOBODY! Most importantly, the nail situation. Ok?! You have to be committed if you're gonna put peep toe shoes on ok you have to plan that shit the day before. Wanna pop on some peep toe shoes to quickly nip out to the shop? NO. You can't do that because if your nail polish isn't on point, then you just can't pull them off the same way. Basically, peep toe shoes are completely impractical and are more effort than they are worth. Period.
Number 3: the skater skirt
The skater skirt should be left in 2012 where it belongs because honestly, look at them. They're all poofy and if you've a big ass then it looks 10X bigger and if you've no ass, the skirt unkindly drifts over your butt for everyone to see that you ain't Kimmy K. Skater skirts with their jersey material and little pleats are just a no go for me. I just feel like they're not flattering at all and make you feel about 10 years old and the only thing they match with is well something else from the New Look generation section... Soz.
Number 2: Capes
There is something about capes, and the tendency to spew Aztec print all over them and then you can't wear them with anything because it doesn't match, but then you go and wear it anyway because... Yolo? No you don't, don't do it. Unless you're a superhero or you feel the need to put on a small duvet every day, why bother? I do actually own a cape, it's the only thing from my list that I do own. However it's grey, loose knitted and is a polo neck and I kinda feel it isn't your generic cape. I've only worn it a couple times and yes it's very comfy so functionally I recommend capes, but come on, look at them!
Number 1: WHITE jeans
Can we just take a minute to look at these. They look good eh? Wrong. They look ridiculous. They're firstly impractical because you can't sit down anywhere without having a panic attack in case you've settled down in some bird crap or smeared chocolate on your lap or otherwise. Also, they accentuate every single curve or bulge or line or knicker line or butt line or knee crease - it is all revealed through white jeans you may as well not wear any jeans at all. Sinful. Don't do it. Pls.
Hope you aren't too offended by my post, don't wanna offend just sharing my views lads - rant over.